24’s Most Ridiculous Storylines

24’s Jack Bauer (Kiefer Sutherland) and less-than-plausible story lines have always had an uneasy alliance. Every really bad day of Bauer’s packs so many plot devices into 24 hours it’s hard to always keep things fresh. Here are a few of the most ridiculous plotlines the writers of the Fox series conjured up over eight seasons:

24 Boss: There will be no “happily ever after” for Jack Bauer

Teri Bauer Gets Amnesia (Day 1)
After being kidnapped and raped in Season 1, Teri (Leslie Hope) and Kim (Elisha Cuthbert) are taken to a safe house, which ends up being compromised. While the two flee the scene, Kim’s car goes over the side of a hill. Believing she has witnessed Kim’s death, Teri suddenly experiences dissociative amnesia. She spends the next several episodes incapable of remembering anything about her life. After being brought back to her home and nearly shot, she is saved by Tony Almeida (Carlos Bernard), which kicks her memory back into gear. Convenient!

Kim Bauer Is Hunted by a Cougar (Day 2)
When Kim becomes an au pair for a family with an abusive father, she decides to run with their daughter, Megan, in order to protect her. On the way to a cabin in the woods, she’s arrested on suspicion of murder after the body of Megan’s mother is found in the trunk. After fleeing custody, Kim gets lost in the forest and is chased by a cougar (the animal, not Courteney Cox) before getting caught in an animal trap. A man takes her in and tricks her into thinking a nuclear bomb has gone off in Los Angeles.

Jack’s Father Implicit in a Terrorism Plot (Day 6)
When Jack is called in to investigate his father’s ties to Russian suitcase nukes, he’s subsequently kidnapped with his dad, Phillip (James Cromwell), by his brother, Graem (Paul McCrane). Once apprehended by CTU, Phillip secretly speaks with Graem, telling him not to reveal their ties to the assassinations of President Palmer (Dennis Haysbert), Tony Almeida and Michelle Dessler (Reiko Aylesworth), along with being implicit in the Sentox nerve-gas conspiracy, which led to the death of Edgar Stiles (Louis Lombardi) at CTU. To assure his son won’t spill the beans, he poisons him, but later dies himself on an oil rig after being shot by his grandson, Josh (Evan Ellingson).

Tony Is Alive (Day 7)
After his wife dies in a car bombing, Tony is grievously injured and brought to CTU in Season 5. He soon discovers who was behind the hit on his wife and attempts to kill him with a poison syringe. Unfortunately, Christopher Henderson turns the syringe on Tony, killing him. But wait: Tony returns in Season 7, explaining to Jack that he was revived by a mercenary group because the syringe missed his major arteries. Tony’s new mission: To exact revenge on the people who killed his wife.

President Taylor Teams With Charles Logan (Day 8)
After nearly two seasons where Allison (Cherry Jones) shows her strong morals — which included having her daughter arrested after she hired a hitman to kill Season 7’s big villain — the president decides to team up with the ethically dubious Charles Logan (Gregory Itzin), the most disgraced president in 24’s history. With her peace treaty in danger of falling apart should anyone find out the Russians had a hand in the assassination of Omar Hassan (Anil Kapoor), Taylor puts Jack Bauer on lockdown, essentially making him an enemy of the state.

Dana Walsh as CTU’s Final Mole (Day 8)
It’s no surprise that 24’s final season should include a mole. In fact, the only season that didn’t have a mole was Day 3. Dana Walsh (Katee Sackhoff), however, is one of the trickiest of them all. After a ridiculous story line involving an ex-boyfriend and a murderous past, it’s actually revealed that she was planted in CTU by the Russians, who led the assassination of Omar Hassan and the near-attack on New York City. Jack murders her execution-style after learning of her loose ties to Renee Walker’s (Annie Wersching) death.

Which ridiculous plotlines were your favorites?

Posted in 24.

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