The 10 Worst-Sounding New TV Pilots


We love TV network pilot season because it’s filled with such potential. So many shows in their infancy, casting announcements flying around, the anticipation of something new from our favorite showrunners… But while many of the announced pilots already have us praying for full-season pick-ups, there are plenty of others that we hate based on what little we know about them. Here are the potential shows that we hope don’t make it to the fall lineup.

10. “Kindreds” (NBC)
A grouchy patent lawyer and a group of oddball associates work at a quirky law practice. Yeah, we like Kathy Bates, Ben Chaplin, and Brittany Snow but this seems like the most predictable David E. Kelley show yet. We can do without another “Ally McBeal.”

9. “Body of Evidence” (ABC)
Speaking of overcrowded genres, this series — starring Dana Delany and Jeri Ryan — is about a neurosurgeon/medical examiner who butts heads with her bosses. Because, you know, there aren’t approximately 12 million surgeons, CSIs, and MEs on TV already.

8. “Who Gets the Parents?” (ABC)
The plot of this one pains us. It’s a sitcom about grown adults having a hard time adjusting to their parents’ divorce. We don’t care that it stars Adam Arkin and Jane Kaczmarek, it just sounds awkwardly stupid.

7. “Cutthroat” (ABC)
So take a dash of “Alias” and a heaping helping of “Weeds” and stir them in a pot and you get this mess of a show. Mia Maestro is starring as a single mother running a drug cartel out of her suburban Beverly Hills house. Please, ABC, don’t pick up this show.

6. “This Little Piggy” (NBC)
Warning: Vanessa Minnillo is trying to act. Worse, she’s trying to be funny in a contrived-sounding sitcom about siblings who move into the house they inherited from their parents. Did we mention the show has Vanessa Minnillo in it?

5. “Untitled Wyoming Project” (CW)
This new offering from “Gilmore Girls” guru Amy Sherman-Palladino is about a guy who moves to a ranch in Wyoming to take care of his three little sisters. Since we watched every single episode of “Gilmore,” we should be optimistic, right? No. Because we also saw “The Return of Jezebel James.”

4. “Defenders” (CBS)
Jerry O’Connell and Jim Belushi star as “fiery Las Vegas defense attorneys.” Doesn’t sound so bad… until you realize that it isn’t a sitcom. Not sure we want to see (or would buy) either of these guys as hard-hitting lawyers.

3. “S–t My Dad Says” (CBS)
This one seems problematic from the get-go, given that it’s based on a Twitter account, has a title that will likely need to be changed and sounds pretty formulaic. Even casting William Shatner doesn’t convince us that this show should live long and prosper.

2. “Hawaii Five-O” (CBS)
The show’s cast is a geek smorgasbord that includes Daniel Dae Kim (“Lost), Alex O’Loughlin (“Moonlight”), Grace Park (“Battlestar Galactica”), and James Marsters (“Buffy”). Yet we really dread hearing O’Moonlight say “Book ’em, Danno” to Scott Caan. Especially after Alex’s last DOA series.

1. “Wright vs. Wrong” (ABC)
This does that annoying cutesy thing where the title makes a bad pun out of a character’s name, and that’s enough to make us hate it sight unseen. Debra Messing stars as a Republican pundit named Evelyn Wright (get it? get it?) whose personal life is put under the microscope because of her public image. It all just sounds like a cringeworthy show from the ’80s.



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